First-World Prison Problems- #4


Prison (camp) sucks. You’re not only locked up with dangerous types (though on average, about 25 yrs past their “best used by” date), but sociopaths who don’t know how to shut a microwave door without slamming it.

The little plastic interlock thingy broke on ours and now our unit’s down to one that works. This means that occasionally I’ll have to wait 5 minutes or so to reheat my coffee. (We have a Bunn hot water dispenser, thank God.) Don’t get me started on the ice machine that’s been down for over a month! I have to walk to the unit next door, over 40 ft away, to use theirs. On top of that journey, I have to dodge the hostility of their people, for ignoring the handprinted sign taped on the door of the maintenance room- “Ice machine for this unit’s residents only!”

It’s just like ghetto gang warfare in here, or so I’ve been told.

(Cue Elvis Presley’s “In The Ghetto”)